Creepy Christmas, Day 10: The Festive Catalonian 'Pooping Log' Tradition
Welcome to our first annual ViralNova Presents: 25 Days Of Creepy Christmas special section! Every day, from December 1st to December 25th, we”re posting a new Christmas themed article guaranteed to get you in the creepy holiday spirit.
In this series, we”ve already seen some creepy Christmas traditions from other countries (though it”s not like our traditions are any less weird). This particular tradition sounds like a South Park joke. In Catalonia, an autonomous community within Spain, there is a tradition of the Tio de Nadal, which roughly translates to “pooping log.” It”s a log that poops, you see, and it is a very sacred tradition of the Catalonian people.
Meet Tio.
This is the Tio de Nadal, customarily a hollowed out log. In modern times, Tio has grown two legs, two eyes, and a cheerful holiday smile. Sometimes, he likes to wear a knit hat, but he is most comfortable in a warm Christmas blanket like the one seen here.
Beating and Defecation.
On Christmas Day, the family gathers around the little log and beats it, commanding it to poop out a lot of presents. Before this, the children traditionally go into another room and pray for a big haul of poop this year while the parents hide the presents under Tio”s blanket.
The Ritual.
Tio”s feast begins the day of the Immaculate Conception (traditionally Dec. 8). Children give him a little bit to eat and tuck him into his blanket every night until Christmas.
Gifts.
Tio pooped nice for us this year! Typical Tio gifts include candy, nuts, and when it”s all out of gifts, it poops a large salty herring. It also apparently “pees” white wine into a bowl for the parents.
There”s even a song that goes with the Tio de Nadal to be joyfully sung in between beating the log and telling it to poop for you. It is as follows:
Caga tio,
Tio de Nadal,
No caguis arengades,
Que son massa salades
Caga torrons
Que son mes bons!”
This roughly translates to:
Poop log,
Log of Christmas,
Don”t poop herrings,
They are too salty,
Poop nougats (turron)
They are much better!
How festive! You know Tio is actually pretty cute when you get used to him. Though I do wonder: if this is their Christmas tradition, what is Lent like?
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